You Call This a Present?
by Convergence Secret Santa 2014
Summary: For: Lexi, The Master has summoned the King of Hell. What does the Timelord have in store for him?


**The Convergence Secret Santa**

**For:** Lexi  
><strong>Penname: <strong>Enderstar  
><strong>Character: <strong>Crowley  
><strong>Other Character's Used: <strong>The Master  
><strong>Rating: <strong>T for language  
><strong>Genre(s): <strong>Humor/Friendship  
><strong>Message: <strong>Happy holidays! Hope you have a lovely Christmas and an even better New Year! Ho ho ho!

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><p><strong><span>You Call This A Present?<span>**

_The Master has summoned the King of Hell. What does the Timelord have in store for him?_

Master finished the last sigil for the summoning and placed the bowl of ingredients on top. The Timelord stuck a match against its box, the red end lighting up with a flare. Holding the lit match over the bowl, he dropped it. The ingredients inside lit up with a spark, thick smoke curling toward the ceiling.

"_Ad ligandum eos pariter eos coram me. _Otherwise known as, get your bloody arse down-up here Crowley." The Timelord turned away from the bowl, leaning over a wooden table to grab an unopened bottle of Jack.

"Not many people summon me directly anymore. I feel honored." Master rolled his eyes, turning back around to face the Demon King.

"Don't feel honored. I was bored, found that little ritual thing-y in a book and thought what the hell. I summoned you because you're the only Demon I know and getting to know another is a hassle I don't want to go through."

Crowley resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He stepped around the Timelord, plucking the bottle from his hands. He turned the bottle over in his hands, reading the label.

"20 years old. May I ask where you found this?" The Demon cracked open the seal, snapped his fingers to summon a glass, and poured himself some.

"Somewhere. The guy who had it pissed me off and I may have killed him." Master shrugged his shoulders, pulling a glass down from a cupboard.

He stole the bottle back from the Demon, pouring himself an unhealthy amount of the amber liquid. There was a companionable silence as the two sipped from their glasses. Crowley found a chair and sat down, crossing one leg over the other. Master followed his suit and found a chair as well. Unlike the Demon, he just sprawled himself over his seat, elbow resting on the armrest.

"Now, mind telling me the real reason behind summoning me?" Crowley said, interrupting the silence. The Timelord scowled at him, throwing his drink back. He was going to need more alcohol for this conversation.

"Yuletide and all that shite. Happy Hanukah and whatever." Master waved a hand absentmindedly in the air, filling his glass to the brim. Crowley made a choking noise, spluttering around his drink.

"You do know I'm a demon. I don't celebrate Christmas."

"You don't say." Master replied with biting sarcasm. "I'm an Alien from another planet. You think we celebrated Christmas there?"

Crowley resisted the urge to snap his lungs away. Instead he uncrossed his legs, then cross them again the other way.

"So, why the celebrating?"

"I'm going native. Might as well do as the native's do. When in Rome and all that shite." Master shrugged his shoulder once more, downing the rest of the Jack in his glass. Crowley snorted, sipping at the amber liquid in his glass.

"There are better ways to go native." The Demon could not believe he was having his conversation. He was going slightly soft in his old age.

"We are **not** having this conversation. I'm way too sober for it anyhow." The Timelord derailed his line of thought, stopping the conversation before it really started. "Anyway, I got you a present. It's over by the bowl of weird shite. You can't miss it."

Crowley was intrigued and slightly wary. He stood up and walked over to the bowl of summoning herbs and ingredients. Next to the bowl was a severed head, a blue bow neatly atop the hair. The eyes were closed and the mouth was sewn shut. The Demon picked up the head slowly by the hair, the blue bow falling off and to the floor. He turned around and looked at the Timelord, eyebrow raised.

"I'm going to take a wild guess and say that this is the owner of the home we are in." Master looked at the head, then at the Demon King.

"Points for being smart." He gave a shrug. "It was the closest thing I could find at the time."

"And the mouth?" Crowley asked, sitting back down in his seat, the head on the table next to him.

"Guy wouldn't stop screaming. I closed his eyes because dead eyes are just creepy."

Crowley made an odd humming sound, glancing at the head out the corner of his eyes. The clock filled the awkward silence with its loud ticking. Master stared at the wall opposite him, shifting in his seat. The Demon King plucked the blue bow from the head, playing with the shaped ribbon. Master let out a loud growl, spinning around the face the other male.

"All right! I know that it's not the best, but if you don't want it just say so." The Timelord spat out harshly, throwing his glass at the clock to shut it up. Crowley startled from the burst of anger from the other, hand clenching around the bow and crushing it.

"No. I'm going to keep it. I'll put it with my other severed heads." He sounded very insane at the mention of a severed head collection. Master rolled his eyes.

"Okay leave now. I gave you my present, shared some alcohol, and talked a little. Go now." The Timelord shooed him in the direction of the door. Crowley was quick to take the expulsion. He gathered the severed head under his arm and walked over to the door.

"Thank for the Jack. And for the head." The Demon King opened the door and slipped out before the Timelord could hurl something at him. Maybe the crazy Alien was alright.

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><p><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> The Convergence Roleplay is owned by Bob (TheName'sBob) and Lena (xX-The-Mad-Man-With-A-Box-Xx). All OC's belong to their respective Roleplayers. All Characters belong to their respective franchises.

**The Roleplay: **With no idea why they're stuck on an odd planet, with seemingly no way home, a collection of fictional characters must band together to continue to ask themselves why they are there, and figure out exactly what the gigantic box dominating the world is for. Welcome to the Convergence.

The Convergence is a Multifandom RP, featuring Supernatural, Doctor Who, Sherlock, Harry Potter, Marvel Studios MCU, Percy Jackson, the Vampire Diaries, the Hunger Games, Merlin, Once Upon a Time, Divergent and the Fox MCU! Check out the Link in the profile!


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